How to Build a Habit

Habits run on structure, not willpower

It is common for New Year's resolutions to fizzle out within weeks. Many people blame weak willpower, but more often the problem is how the habit was built. Willpower runs out easily on tired or busy days, so any behavior that requires a fresh decision every time is hard to sustain. A habit is something you do naturally in a particular situation without much thought. So the goal is not to resolve harder, but to make the behavior small and easy and give it a fixed place in your day so there is nothing to decide. It also tends to work better to settle one habit before moving on to the next, rather than trying to change several at once.

Start very small

If you try to hit a big goal every day from the start, missing a single day makes restarting feel heavy. Instead, start small enough that you can do it even on the day you least want to. For exercise, that might be changing into workout clothes; for reading, one page. It is fine if it seems laughably small. Once you start, you will often do more, and even when you do not, the streak of showing up continues. Increase the amount gradually once the habit has settled. What matters is not the amount but getting your body used to starting in the same place every day.

• Exercise: two push-ups a day
• Writing: one sentence a day
• Tidying: put away one item on your desk before bed

Decide when and where

Plans like "someday" or "when I have time" never happen. Deciding exactly when and where you will act turns that situation into a cue that brings the behavior to mind. Attaching a new habit right after something you already do every day makes it especially easy to follow through without having to remember. Writing it as a single sentence, such as "after I do this, in this place, I will do that," makes it even clearer.

• Drink a glass of water after making your morning coffee
• Walk for ten minutes after lunch
• Open a book instead of your phone when you get into bed

Change your surroundings

People are influenced by their surroundings more than they think. Simply making the behavior you want visible and within reach, and making the one you want to cut inconvenient, changes your choices. Keeping temptation out of sight is far easier than resisting it with willpower. Assigning places helps as well. Pairing spaces with behaviors, such as the desk for work and the bed for sleep, means that simply going there shifts your mindset.

• Lay out workout clothes and shoes the night before
• Keep a book by your bed or in your bag
• Store snacks out of sight on a high shelf
• Leave your phone in another room while studying

Tracking and rewards

Marking a calendar or notebook each day you do the habit is simple but effective. Seeing the marks line up makes you not want to break the chain, and it shows you accurately how often you are really doing it. The simpler the record, the longer it lasts; noting whether you did it or not is enough. Small rewards help too. Linking the behavior closely to something pleasant, such as listening to a favorite song or having a warm drink right after, makes you want to do it again. Just make sure the reward does not undermine the habit you are building.

When you slip

While building a habit, there will always be days you miss. You may be sick, traveling or simply exhausted. The problem is not missing a day; it is quitting altogether because you feel you have already ruined it. Following just one rule, never missing two days in a row, brings the rhythm back quickly. There is also no fixed number of days for a habit to stick. Do not get hung up on the often-quoted figure of a few weeks; it is better to expect that it may take much longer depending on the person and the behavior.

Cutting back bad habits

To reduce a bad habit, use the same principles in reverse: avoid the cue, make the behavior inconvenient and fill the gap with something else. Simply gritting your teeth tends to leave an empty space that the old habit fills again. If something like drinking, smoking or gambling feels hard to control on your own, it is better to seek help from a medical or counseling service than to struggle alone.

• Record for a few days when you do it to find the cue
• Add one more step before you can start
• Choose a replacement behavior that meets the same need
• Tell people around you about your goal and ask for support